Lessons from The Velveteen Rabbit.
One of the hidden culprits behind self-sabotage is the need for perfection and control. Self-sabotage has a strange way of helping us maintain the illusion that if only, we had put in more effort or had better circumstances, everything would have worked out as it should. Social psychologists call this counter-intuitive strategy of regulating self-esteem “self-handicapping.” It’s very seductive to engage in self-sabotage because the hidden payoff is high. Continue at Source: Self-Sabotage and the Art of Becoming Real